There and Back Again

Pondering: All kids’ need is a little help, a little hope and somebody who believes in them. (Magic Johnson)

I was having lunch with a bunch of office mates today, most of them mothers of young kids. Naturally, the topic of most of the conversation was on their kids, their antics, their funny moment, and not so funny moments. Now I’m not one to solicit stories about other people’s kids or fuss-about when kids are in the office, though I like to say hi to them and hear, occasionally, what they have been up to. I am just not kid-friendly because I really don’t have patience for them - a mean thing to say, but sadly, true. I am not rude to them; I just don’t seek to spend time with them. But that’s beside the point. Today, I was willing to listen to any stories just to get my mind off of work and amazingly, the stories of these moms’ – and other mom’s not present during lunch - about the things their kids say and learn from school provided a comic relief for such a stressful morning. Below are a few of the kid stories that caused a chuckle. (Not using real names…)

Carlos – 2 years old. On their way into day care school one day, his mom overheard him mutter, “Jesus Christ!” when he got tangled in some bush near the gate.

Laura – 6 years old, said something funny so her dad says to her, “Oh, Laura. You are such a comedian.” Laura cries in response and says, “I’m not Canadian!”

Carlos again, when he saw his mother miss a step going down the stairs and fall on her behind: “Did you fall, mommy?” and when mom said yes, he asks “are you OK, mommy?” before walking away with a shrug as if to say, “Oh, I’m not the only one who falls off the stairs.” Apparently, he has fallen down the stairs, or off the sofa or bed, quite a number of times.

Gina, 10 or 12 years old (I think). When her mom picked her up from school one day, she was crying. Said some kid – Leo – called her a “nightmare!” She was inconsolable. Her mom bumps into Leo and his mom and she kindly says to him, “Leo, you made Gina cry. Why did you call her a nightmare?” Leo, defensive, says, “well she called me a jack*ss.” Imagine mom’s embarrassment.

Paulo, my nephew – 5 years old (I think). He and his dad were watching TV and there was a bald man on TV. Paulo suggested the man looked his dad who does happen to have a bit of a receding hairline. Paulo’s dad asks, “Paulo, be honest with me, is my hair really that bad?” Paulo ponders for awhile and then says, “Nah! Yours can still be salvaged.”